:)

I did a good job yesterday... Press conference for uKimono was smooth.. from the stage, the sound system, the food, the press, everything was good. I was proud.. i thanks God.. for blessing the event..

Hendri.. D.. Nicko.. Yandi... Susan.. Was there to see the press conference.. i didnt manage to entertain them but, they were there supporting.. Im glad that my friends come to support.. Im glad when they smsed me that they are proud of me.. looking at how the press con was run..

Bb.. i wish u r here.. i think u would be proud as well.. I cried after the press con was done.. i think, this is the greatest achievement that i have ever done in my job.. how i wish.. tat u can see this b.. but i know.. u dun bother nemore... Im silly.. Remembering wad you used to tell me that nite, n thought and wishing that it can still be true but bb.. it was just all dream... i know.. cos u have someone else by your side now...

You used to say.. if one day, you see that i change for better.. i become someone good, you will look at me again.. but bb, will u realli do that? or you were saying that just to make me stop crying then and dont do anything silly? I guessed so...

After the press con, i sit in front of the stage for very long... i dunno wad i was thinking.. i just sat there for very long.. looking at the job tat i had done.. i smiled.. but i cried as well.. Then i look aboove.. then i saw the guys standing there.. D and Hen smiled at me and give me the thumbs up.. the smile.. that made me broke into tears.. i guess the two of them.. are the one who realli know what i had been thru.. then they came down.. Hen gave me a lil doll... Susan gave me a hug... D gave me a lil gratz cards.. At that time... i feel that am fortunate.. Although Bb cant be there.. i still have all these great friends who are there.. but i cant help myself from missing his presence though..

I think, Hen and D realised that.. Hen gave me a hug... and whisper this to my ear... "Everything gonna be okay yah... Inget elow masi ada banyak org yg care n sayang ama kamu, am proud of you.."... I was stunned... I look at him.. and force a smile.. I know they are proud of me.. i know, me too am proud of myself but.. something is just missing.. something that nothing can replace it for now..

And yeah.. after that we went to the 933 hits award.. i cried a lot there.. especially when the artist sings the sad2 song that reminds me of you bb.. i cant help myself.. i keep telling myself.. that you are gone.. but i cant help myself from missing your presence..

Today.. i gonna set off to Jakarta.. another place full of memories but.. i think i gotta get out of Singapore for sometimes first.. go to another place to really build myself up again.. cos i know deep down.. i still feel the pain.. n cos of tat nitemares keep haunting me.. i was awaken again by the cruel nitemare.. This is the 3rd nite.. Nitemares are back haunting me again..

Dearest God,
Thank you for everything yesterday... that everything ran smoothly.. i know You are always around me.. You are the one who never abandon me.. :)